Does This Mean I Have Menopause?

My 18-year-old and I devoured an 8-pack of these delicious PB and chocolate “MenoBars” a year ago this week leaving my bride wondering which one of us are bigger idiots – “Those are menopause bars you dummies – how did you not know that?” As usual I didn’t read the box nor take note of the name – Meno Well. “Figured they were for dudes,” I said, obviously. Apparently I missed the “Power for the PAUSE” subtext. Bridget said we need to at least try to be lucid. Tommy, the last of our 4 kids still in the house at that moment, was worried about the implications. “I’d absolutely be worried Tommy,” I said straight-faced. “You might start hearing your voice crack again, get a bit higher.” His look of fear was well worth it and he and I are both now reading ingredients religiously, so we got that going for us, which is nice. There’s a lot of frustration for women over menopause – so much so the news media did a story about meno-divorce, even saying HRT is so called husband replacement therapy. Well-meaning clinicians acknowledge they are often unable to diagnose and treat menopause quickly and that the field needs a makeover.  More women in their 50s in particular are ditching their traditional PCP and OB for an OBGYN trained in menopause (as our report showed). Nearly 30% in our survey of 1,900 women this month (up from 20% a year ago) indicated they are leaving or thinking of leaving their jobs and “starting fresh” after a difficult 10 years. I’ll admit us boys should be a bit more careful digging into the pantry before stealing what limited joy my wife has living with a couple nincompoops. In our defense, my son is 18 now and thinks with his stomach first and I’m, well, chronically missing what’s right in front of me.