When I Almost Qualified For Medicare

So I’m 55 but believe I may have just qualified for Medicare since I watched a PBS show on how to make a lantern. On a Saturday at 1130 in the morning. When it was sunny outside. Medicare apparently didn’t agree but said this at least may qualify me for a special review of what Medicare might call its “you're basically elderly benefit.“ But still, my request for Medicare benefits was denied. Candidly, I just wanted the supplemental benefits especially the carpet cleaning and the free tooth paste. My wife said to ask for the hearing aides too, "since you haven't heard a thing I've said all week."  I appealed their decision by submitting photographs, like the one showing me cutting my lawn with scissors. That had to qualify me as elderly, for sure. I added that I like cribbage and play pickle ball in a wool sweater inside a senior center where the net is just a piece of masking tape. "Where in the world is that draft coming from? Does no one feel that breeze?" This body of evidence seemed sufficient, nay undisputable, but it still didn’t qualify me. Frustrated, sort of the way my dad gets when his phone starts talking to him in Spanish, I appealed a third time, but Medicare once again denied my request and referred me to a psychological assessor, which I may well need, and then said to reach back out in about 10 years. This whole situation may have just been a dream, I'm not sure; but it sure felt real and makes me wonder if in fact Medicare should expand its eligibility criteria. Personally I think what defines elderly is moreso how we feel and how we behave, not our age or disability only. But what do I know - I text using my index finger, drive 10 miles below the limit, and talk to people in elevators. I may need more evidence for another appeal, so if you have any, just reach me at bcote_18@hotmail.com - yes, hotmail.